I've been receiving emails and messages online from women who've shared with me that they really want to be free and live the life they desire but they can't move past their negative mindset.
They've told me...
I'm too afraid to pursue my dreams because I got bills to pay
I struggle with comparing myself to others
I allow other people's limited perception to define me
I can't help but focus on the negativity going on around me
I have low expectations and I lack support
I fear failure
Recently, I had an epiphany or as Oprah would say an aha! moment where I realized that if I truly want to teach my audience how to create the life they want on their own terms, I first need to help them shift the way they think.
I've noticed that many people are struggling with a negative mindset and it's hard for them to see past their current situation and truly believe that they can have more. If you really want to change your life, you first have to change what you believe about yourself.
It's all about having the right mindset, because whatever you believe about yourself whether positive or negative that's what you'll become.
I shared with you before that there was a time in my life where I didn't feel good about myself or my life and I dealt with low self esteem. After doing some much needed soul searching, I realized that if I wanted to change my life I needed to change my way of thinking.
Last week, I told you five negative statements you should never say to yourself and that you become what you believe. If you don’t control your negative thoughts then you will continue to stay in the same old place in your life. I can’t even have a discussion about pursuing your dreams and living the life you want because you can’t see past your current situation.
Today, I’m going to share seven ways to get your mind right and be sure to sign up for the free workshop where I'll go into more detail about each one.
CHOOSE TO FORGIVE OTHERS
What if I told you that forgiveness has nothing to do with the person who hurt you but it’s about you having peace of mind and being able to move forward in your life. People can do and say some really mean stuff that will keep you mentally stuck and prevent you from living a fulfilled life. At some point you have to allow yourself to forgive them whether you feel they deserve it or not. Forgiveness is for you, not them. Don’t allow someone to take up space in your mind when chances are they’ve already moved on in their life.
STOP FEELING GUILTY FOR YOUR MISTAKES
You’ve been carrying around guilt for years from mistakes that you've made in your past that you cannot change. You have to accept it and move on. Stop beating yourself up over things you cannot control. Listen, it’s the start of a new year, accept it, own it and move forward.
STOP BEING A PEOPLE PLEASER
You know how the saying goes, you can’t please everybody, so why do you keep trying? You’re seeking validation and approval from others when those same people could care less about your happiness. Stop putting everyone else's needs before your own. Focus on taking care of you because no one else is going to do it for you. Fall in love with yourself and realize that your opinion of you is all that matters.
CHANGE YOUR CIRCLE
Toxic people are draining. The negative energy that they project is stunting your growth. You've kept these individuals around because you care about them and you don't want to hurt them. Jim Rohn said, you become like the average five people you spend the most time with. Take a minute and think about the people you talk to on a daily/weekly basis. Are they adding value to your life or is their energy always negative? You’re influenced by your environment whether you think so or not. If you want to grow then you need to change the people you surround yourself with.
STOP LIVING IN THE PAST
Are you living a life of regret which is causing you to stay stuck in the past? If you don't get anything else from this post please get this, let the past go. You can't change it. Life happens and you have to move on otherwise you cannot live up to your fullest potential. Stop blaming others for what they did or didn’t do because chances are they are no longer thinking about it. If you struggle with letting go of the past I highly recommend getting professional counseling to help you move forward. If money is an issue check out this post on 81 Awesome Mental Health Resources When You Can’t Afford a Therapist.
Showing gratitude can go a long way and really help you start to think more positive. It's easy to get bogged down with the busyness of life that we take for granted the little things that we should be grateful for. Take time and appreciate everything that's around you. Keep a gratitude journal and jot down 3-5 things that you’re grateful for each day.
RECITE POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS
I told you last week that the words that you say to yourself matter. Whether positive or negative what you say and think about yourself speaks volumes. I’m a firm believer that you become what you believe and it’s something I say to myself all the time. If you need a list of affirmations be sure to check out last week post and download the free worksheet. Speak life over yourself. Check out the Girl Be Free Affirmation Card Deck
How do you plan to shift your mindset in the new year?